…Of Dead Beat Dads and such

(This post is for the awesome men in my life.  SO, if you don't want to read it, go down & watch some inspirational videos I posted about Fathers.)

In a world where men are labeled with many negative titles that leave many of us to wonder or ponder, “are there any good men left in this world?”  The answer to that particular question is a resounding yes!  As I share with you some of the men that are “good” men in my life, I invite you to think of some men in your lives who have made a difference in your life.

I will begin with my father who was a good man.  He graduated from West Point and served in the Army for twenty years.  He sacrificed his time and family life in order to take up arms to protect the freedoms we enjoy today.  While I have never agreed with the Viet Nam War, my father was deployed there and fought to help bring freedom to the Vietnamese people.  And alas, we know the outcome of those efforts.  I have his journal of when he did his tour of duty over there.  Many pages are blank, yet they are numbered with counted days of being in that country.  When he did write something, it was usually to describe an illness he contracted or being shot at by snipers.  He instilled in me many values that I still hold dear today.  He taught me to respect and to honor.  He taught me to appreciate my freedom.  He infused in me values that I in turn have been able to pass on to my children.  He also taught me humor and to laugh~this being one of my favorite memories.  One of my favorite stories is when Mom told Dad he “was NOT funny!”  He was crushed as he prided himself on being extremely funny…and, he was!  He was quite the rebel rouser when he was a youngster and it is so fun to reminisce with cousins as they retell stories of “Hayden” when he was a lad.  Dad passed away on July 4, 2000, but I will be ever grateful to him for his example of being a “good man.”

My son, Aaron, is another example of a good man.  While he can be a bit headstrong at times (with me), he has a kindness and gentleness for his sweet wife Katie.  I love watching how he teases here incessantly.  He has taken up cooking, and together, Katie and Aaron create masterpiece recipes.  When asked if they have ever argued, he gives a resounding “No!”  He said he decided a long time ago that he just was not going to argue and to find a solution to prevent any such occurrence.  He jumps in and helps around the house.  He is a good loving husband.  I also love hearing stories of how he is able to reach those difficult patients with his wit and humor.  Everyone seems to like Aaron.  I am grateful to be his mother and to be able to learn from his example.

My SIL, Jeff is yet another example of a good man.  He is an incredible father.  I love to watch him play with my darling granddaughters.  I love to watch their eyes light up when he walks through the door at night.  He plays chase.  He plays hide and seek.  He takes them to the park.  He takes them on daddy/daughter date nights.  The list goes on and on.  Chelsea is pregnant with #3 and she has been a little cranky from being so tired.  Jeff put a pregnancy-tracking app on his phone.  When I was up north recently, Chelsea got a little grumpy with Jeff.  Instead of getting mad, Jeff pulled up the P-T app and looked at what week Chelsea was at.  He then read all the “symptoms” that pertain to that week of pregnancy and said, “ok, so this is normal.”  I could not stop laughing.  He has taught me much and I am grateful for his example of being a good man.

My other SIL, Richard is an example of a good man.  I have less experience with Richard as Rachel & Richard have been married a little less than a year.  But, he opens Rachel’s doors.  He helps her out around the house.  He likes her cooking and enjoys her new recipes.  I am grateful for him and his kindness to Rachel.

I don’t know why, but, I have also thought a lot about a cousin, Roger.  He and my father grew up together.  Roger is truly a good man.  He also has a sense of humor~it’s a Payne thing!  When Mom and I went out to visit Roger & Carol quite a few years ago, Roger put a remote control battery operated “fart” machine under the seat cushion of the couch Mom was sitting on.  Every time Mom got up, Roger made the machine sound off.  Every time she sat down, it went off.  Mom was pretty perplexed and finally said, “your cushions must be letting air go.”  Roger then showed his little contraption off and we all had a good laugh.  During that visit though, we were talking about different situations in life and some of the difficulties that were going along with them.  I will never forget Roger’s comment and I have seriously tried to implement this into my own life.  He said, “it is always better to ere on the side of gratitude.”  This is such a great way to live our lives…with the attitude of gratitude.  It softens our hearts and helps others as well.  I am grateful for this cousin who has imparted many wisdoms to me and exemplified goodness to all of us Payne’s.

Last, but certainly not the least, my good husband is a wonderful example not only to me, but also to his family and to our children.  I think Zach’s death has certainly amplified all of Mark’s attributes as a husband and father.  I have loved watching him as a father.  We all know that there is nothing like a Mother’s love, but I am here to tell you that there is nothing like a Father’s love as well.  When he was doing his internship, he would have to get up early and be to the hospital early.  Chelsea would get up early with Mark and eat breakfast with him every morning.  For Mark, that is a treasured memory.  When Mark would go to conferences at Snow Bird, he would take Aaron with him every year.  They would ski together every day and those are sweet memories for Mark.  Rachel wanted to learn to ski and Mark took her up the mountain to do so.  She was fearless and Mark had to get her to slow down.  She got mad at him and that tickled Mark.  He loved that time with her.  Then there was Zach.  Zach was the child he had the most time to spend with and that has turned out to be one of the biggest blessings with many treasured memories.  Mark taught Zach to ride the waves on a boogie board.  He taught him to golf.  He taught him to ski.  They would ride bikes together.  They would hike together.  Mark and Zach were inseparable and had a very special relationship.  You can tell that being a father has been fulfilling and one of life’s greatest blessings.  I am grateful for Mark’s example and all he has taught our children.  I am grateful that he loves our children and our family completely.

I am especially grateful for a Father in Heaven who has given me the great opportunity and privilege to live on this Earth.   He has blessed me with a family, an eternal family.  He gave us His precious Son, our Savior and Redeemer.   He has provided the way for us to return to Him one day and be reunited with those we love so dearly.  I have a deep love and gratitude to and for my Heavenly Father and my Savior.  We truly do not have to look too far to find the perfect examples of perfect men.

Each of us has many examples of “good” men in our lives.  I invite you to think about them with the “attitude of gratitude.”  Happy Father’s Day to ALL you incredible men!!!

The superhero in my life <3

Love this Dove add about Fathers

A song to bring it all home

I thought this was a cute video giving credit to ALL our Fathers do <3