Have you ever wondered if God really knows who you are?

I have.

Since Zach’s passing I have had moments where I have truly wondered if God really knows who I am.  And during those moments I find myself asking, “Heavenly Father, do You really know who I am?”

For those particular moments of sincere questioning, an answer has always come.  My answers have come in many ways and most of them are unexpected, yet tailored just for me.  And through those unforeseen answers, I feel His loving words, “oh my dear daughter, I know who you are and I love you.”  And almost every time, I also feel Him tell me “you already know this.”

I can feel His love through my beautiful family.  When I look into their eyes and feel of their unconditional love for me, I somehow know that my Father in Heaven loves me.  There is something “heavenly” about a family’s love.  Whether through phone calls, face time, texts, or actual visits, hugs, and even kisses, I believe those are the precious moments that not only keep us close as a family, but also keep us close to God.  The love I have for my family offers me a glimpse of the love that my Father in Heaven has for even me.

I can feel His love through incredible friends.  Let me just say that on one or more occasion (mostly more), my dear friends have blessed my life.  My friends just seem to know when I need a Diet Coke, yummy chocolate cake, a new emoji app, a text, or a phone call.  In a world where everyone is so incredibly busy, that simple act of what I label as “service” let’s me know I am loved.  It reminds me of the scripture from Mosiah 2:17:  “And behold, I tell you these things that ye may learn wisdom; that ye may learn that when ye are in the service of your fellow beings ye are only in the service of your God.”

Through gratitude, I can truly feel of my Father in Heaven’s love for me.  Why gratitude you ask?  Let me just begin by saying that my sweet mother taught me gratitude at a VERY young age.  For every gift or help I may have received, I had to write “Thank You” notes.  That tutoring has continued on to my children.  After Zach’s funeral, I wrote nearly 130 thank you notes.  People didn’t expect it, but with all the charitable acts that were sweetly given to us, how could I not?!  Writing those thank you notes was therapeutic.  At a time when I was emotionally devastated, those thank you notes helped me to feel of God’s love for me.  Through those thank you notes came the realization of ALL that was done for my family and me.  I thought of the scripture in Ephesians 1:16 “Cease not to give thanks…”  Gratitude in everything we have, do, or receive is essential in keeping us grounded in knowing and appreciating God’s love for us.

Yesterday morning I opened our patio doors to enjoy the cool air just after it had finished raining.  I observed some of the low lying clouds hanging over the bluffs, the grass seemed a little greener, a few rays of the sun were trying to peek out between the clouds, the fresh smell that comes from rain, and then the words to a Primary song came to mind.

“I like to look for rainbows whenever there is rain

And ponder on the beauty of an earth made clean again.

I want my life to be as clean as earth right after rain.

I want to be the best I can and live with God again.”

I want to be the BEST I can to live with God again.  I have a deep love for my Father in Heaven and my Savior Jesus Christ.  For with that particular love, I begin to understand, feel, and know of how They reciprocate Their love for me.  Unconditional love.  A parent’s love for their children is steadfast and unconditional.  And so it is with our Father in Heaven~He is steadfast in His love for each of us.

I Am His Daughter